Lost Time

I managed to pick up a raging case of food poisoning yesterday. The offending product was rancid Bleu Cheese dressing on a salad I ordered while watching football.  I was a few bites into the salad, which had been drowned in the dressing, before I realized that – yes, indeed – the dressing tasted funky.

At around 1:00 in the morning I came to realize that I’d consumed enough of the rotten stuff to catch a significant case of salmonella poisoning.  I was reminded of that fact about every 20 minutes for the rest of the night. Around 6:00 in the morning, I tried to find a substitute for my class but to no avail.  I grabbed a shower, my knees shaking as I tried to hurry and get ready. I managed to survive an hour and a half at work – long enough for my students to turn in their projects and be graded.  Then I bolted for home.

The rest of my day was spent sleeping in various positions on my sofa and in my bed.  I couldn’t get comfortable.  I couldn’t get my stomach to settle. I couldn’t stop thinking about all of the things I needed to be doing other than waiting for my body to heal.

I hate being sick.  I’m used to running at full-tilt in my life, and when I’m forced to slow down against my will, I get very resentful. My husband likes to remind me that sometimes the need to slow down and pay attention to myself has to be forced on me, like the time I picked up e-coli and the doctors discovered I had colon polyps. Yeah – that one got my attention.

My body having been forced into slow motion, my brain managed to keep working.  I wrote several outlines for books while I flopped around on my bed.  Initially they were in my head, but as I started feeling better, I made my way to my office and typed the outlines into a form I developed. That made me feel a little better; however, looking around my office I realized that there were so many things I needed to be working on for which I completely lacked the energy.

It’s finals week at school. I have papers to grade and grades to be entered. I’m behind on ICL work and I need to dedicate a significant amount of time to catching up. I have revisions to work on for several books. I have presentations to prepare. All these reminders sit heavy on my mind. But today is lost. Today forced me to stop and be mostly still. I guess I’ll have to start over tomorrow.

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